So, there I was—minding my peaceful, soul-nourishing business—reading Mary, Teach Me to Be Your Daughter by Megan Madden. It’s a beautiful book that dives into what we know about the Blessed Mother and how her humility, obedience, and self-denial are blueprints for godly womanhood.
But then, like clockwork, someone with a Wi-Fi signal and a superiority complex entered the chat.
“Better would be the read your bible, and pray that Jesus would teach you to be a true follower Colossians 2:6-7!!”
Sir… respectfully, no one was talking to you. Also respectfully, do you read the Bible, or do you just skim for verses to weaponize?
Let me be clear: I love Jesus. I’ve been following Him longer than some folks have had a mortgage. I believe in the authority of Scripture. And guess what? Mary is literally in it—not just as scenery, but as a central, courageous, Spirit-filled, prophetic, poetic, wildly obedient, and yes, sinless figure. The angel Gabriel called her "full of grace." The Holy Spirit overshadowed her. She said yes to God's will when nobody else could have. She carried the Word made Flesh in her literal womb. What more do you want?
Oh, but I know what it is.
If the book had been titled Ruth, Teach Me to Be Your Daughter, we wouldn’t be having this conversation. Ruth is palatable. She's the girl who gets the man at the end and says things like “where you go I will go,” which people like to put on mugs and pretend she said to Boaz (spoiler: she said that to her mother-in-law, Naomi). Ruth is safe because she doesn’t make insecure men sweat.
Mary? Mary is dangerous.
Mary is the woman who sang a revolutionary song about the proud being scattered, the lowly being lifted, and the rich being sent away empty. Mary is the woman who told her Son, the literal Messiah, “They have no wine,” and then looked at the servants like, “He’s got this,” before He had even performed a miracle. Mary is the woman at the foot of the Cross while the men ran and hid.
No wonder she makes people uncomfortable.
Let’s also talk about the absolute absurdity of saying “follow Jesus!” as though Mary didn’t. She followed Him more closely than anyone else on earth. She followed Him from Bethlehem to Calvary. And if you’re following Him right now, guess who’s already way ahead of you on the path? Yeah. Mary. She taught Jesus how to walk. You think she can’t teach me how to be a woman of God?
The real issue here isn’t the book I’m reading. It’s that some people think women’s voices, especially strong Catholic ones, need to be policed, silenced, or shoved back into the “supporting role.” That somehow, talking about womanhood through the lens of the Mother of God is “unbiblical.” My guy, she literally gave us the Bible. Jesus is the Word, and she gave Him flesh.
Let’s all take a deep breath, sip some water (or wine—Mary’s got that covered), and remember: just because a woman is growing in faith doesn’t mean she’s required to consult the Bro Council of Doctrinal Gatekeeping.
And to all the ladies navigating faith, femininity, and the occasional online troll: read the books that inspire you. Reflect on the women God chose—Ruth, Esther, Deborah, Mary, and yes, even Jael with the tent peg. Because they didn’t play small.
And neither should you.
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