Navigating Faith

As I continue on my journey of faith, a lot of people have asked me about whether I went to my first confession. The short answer is: I did not. There are multiple reasons for this, but one that stands out is my difficulty with the doctrine of transubstantiation. I just can't seem to reconcile it. I fully believe in Christ's real presence, but I don't see how it all hinges on the specific nature of that presence. Is it consubstantiation versus transubstantiation? What about those who hold a symbolic view, but still acknowledge Christ’s role in the sacrament? For me, my personal belief centers on Christ being present, rather than how that presence manifests in the physical elements. This belief, while meaningful to me, has placed me at odds with certain aspects of Catholic teaching—specifically regarding the Eucharist. The Catholic Church teaches that transubstantiation is essential to understanding Christ's presence in the Eucharist, and my refusal to fully accept this ...

Dear Fathers, I write to you with deep respect and gratitude for the work you do in guiding souls toward Christ and His Church. The journey of faith is a sacred and personal one, and your role as spiritual fathers is invaluable. You pour your hearts into teaching, encouraging, and welcoming those who seek to enter the Catholic Church. For many, the OCIA process leads to the joyous moment of full communion. But for some, after months of discernment, the decision is made to step back. This letter is for those moments—when a catechumen or candidate chooses, for whatever reason, not to enter the Church at this time. Please know that this is not a failure. It is not a failure on your part, nor on the part of the sponsors, the catechists, or the catechumen or candidate themselves. Faith journeys do not always follow a straight path. Sometimes, God calls a person to wait, to wrestle with questions a little longer, or to grow in ways unseen before they take that final step. As priests, you hav...

Tomorrow night marks the third session of my OCIA journey, and I find myself grappling with a whirlwind of emotions. A sense of dread looms over me, mingling with a nagging question: what have I gotten myself into? The biggest query, however, is whether I should continue on this path. As I reflect on the past year away from my church, it becomes clear that I need a period of rest and reflection to heal from the wounds I’ve experienced within that community. After a year of silence from my pastor, I received a brief message on Facebook expressing sympathy for the loss of my beloved dog, Biscuit. Twelve months without a word, and this was the outreach I received? In contrast, during my brief absence from another parish, the priest reached out to check in after just two Sundays. This disconnection has left me questioning my place in the church and the support it offers. Just tonight, a fellow OCIA participant called me, struggling to understand the Catechism. I was happy to help her; in f...

Yesterday, I poured out some of the reservations I have about the Catholic Church and what it means for me to become Catholic. I’ve wrestled with a variety of concerns—from the theology surrounding communion to the daunting idea that some might be deemed less worthy of heaven. There’s also the worry about my role in leading a Bible study if I’m not yet Catholic. Despite these concerns, I’ve been feeling a strong pull to simply rest this year. Resting, in this context, isn’t just about taking a break from the hustle and bustle of everyday life. It feels like a call to spend time in prayer and in God’s presence without the pressure of formal affiliation or joining another church. It’s as if God is nudging me to focus on nurturing my spiritual life in a more personal, introspective way. The comments and advice I’ve received recently have been well-intentioned, but they’ve also triggered some of my past religious trauma. I’ve learned that religious trauma can profoundly affect how we relat...